How shall I start this letter? I don’t know. To me, love has always been the most difficult emotion to express. Many times I feel that even the word love is not expressive enough to what I feel and think when it came to you! What can I say about years and years of admiration, love and warmness?. There are celebrity crushes, fandoms and many other terms that different people use to describe their relationship or admiration for a celebrity, but with you none of these words suffice how I feel about you. None of them even represent 1% of what you are to me. I think the nearest definition to the warmness that I feel when it comes to you is the word “Family”.
Yes, you are that close to me. But I don’t want to be selfish here because I know many others of your true lovers also consider you as family. You have been close to many lives even without realizing that yourself. You may have met some of us and did not meet others but that doesn’t reduce the closeness all these people feel when it comes to you.
Your love has been planted in my family like a beautiful tree and through generations! I still can remember the words of my great grandfather when he said “This girl will go places!” watching your marvelous portrayal of Reshmi in Sadma. Unfortunately Big Grandpa passed away two years after that and did not live enough to see how your magic got stronger and bigger. My grandmother always termed you as the rebellious tigress of the Indian cinema. She always used to say if you want something different watch Sridevi and as a child I could relate to that. Mother on the other hand never termed you as a heroine. She always referred to you as the hero which became the norm after sometime even in the film industry. I have so many fond memories of family trips to the cinema to watch many of your movies. The first film I watched for you was Himmatwala and I think it was during that film that I became a Sridevi die hard fan forever. The craze was getting bigger every year and with every release of your films. I used to buy every single magazine just to read more about you, look at your pictures and read your interviews. I kept this habit until the early 2000s. I even bought magazines that had just few lines of news written about you in one single page. Your love has also passed from me to my nephews and nieces. I still can remember how my four year old niece asked me so innocently “Why is she so beautiful?” when I let her watch Nagina for the first time. How could a question like that be answered? I just smiled, I knew then that the girl was hooked for life. This was your magic Sri. Today this girl is 16 years old and a huge fan of yours. Here you have it. Five generations of my family who experienced your aura in a way or another. That is why I call you family, because you are close to many members of my family and I am sure many other fans feel the same way.
Dear Sri, I am not exaggerating when I say that because of your love I have developed myself and advanced in my life in different ways. Your love was the strong motivation for me to do many things in life that I would not have done without it. Because of it I learned a lot. When the internet became available in the mid of the 1990s I learned whatever I could learn on my own about web design. You had no presence online (Most of Bollywood stars had no presence then) so I wanted to do something about it and make information about you available online for all the fans to see and read. This was the birth of this site which is now known as Sridevi.biz. Photoshop is another thing that I started to learn and that was purely to edit and design your pictures. When Youtube was launched in 2005 a year later and you still had no presence there so I created my channel there in 2006 and the first video that I uploaded was for you and it was your magnificent song Har Kisi Ko Nahi Milta from Janbaaz. This was not just the first video on my channel, but this was the first Sridevi video uploaded on Youtube. Unfortunately a year ago that video was removed due to copyright but it hit more than 11 Million views and hundred thousands likes then! I learned all this because of you and today I am still benefiting from all this in other aspects of my life. You have no idea how I am grateful to all of it. When you decided to make your grand comeback to Bollywood, you joined Twitter so I and many other fans joined too just to be there with you and make our voices heard in many different occasions. Some of us are not that much in social media thing but we still wanted to be there because of you.
Dear Sri, your love has got me in touch with some of the most honest and great people. That happened especially during your comeback days. I have known and interacted with some very wonderful human beings that I admire and respect a lot. We became friends, sometimes we can’t keep in touch a lot because of this busy life but whenever we talk it is like we just talked yesterday. This is the closeness we have together and again you are the reason behind it. I am very very thankful to you and to them to be a part in my life.
Sriji, today is the 13th of August and it is your 55th birthday. This is the first birthday of yours that we will celebrate without your physical presence in this world. It has been more than 6 months since what they say that you left us. I rejected this and I am still rejecting it. To me and many millions of your admirers Sridevi never dies. You live forever in every breeze of air that we breathe and in every single drop of our blood. Yes, I will not deny the ache I still feel in my heart or the tears I shed whenever you come to mind, and believe me when I say that you come to mind a lot more than ever. Whenever I walk at night and look at the moon you come to mind immediately. Whenever I hear the words, star, actor, films, beauty, eyes, talent, queen, empress, cinema etc it is always you. It is always Sridevi, Sridevi, Sridevi. The map of India has always represented India to me, but now even that is not just India but India and Sridevi!. I look at flowers and your picture immediately comes to mind with your various beautiful appearances especially those with flowers on your hair. Today you live with me and inside me more than ever. More than before. I have been avoiding to come online as often because I don’t want read or hear words that you are no more there. It’s a lie. You were always there and will always be.
Dear Sridevi, all I want to say to you on this day is that even though you are not with us physically we truly feel your presence. The love and respect you get from us is still the same if not more. Today you have become immortal with all your great work, achievements and the respect you get. You will never be forgotten. Happy birthday my Queen.